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They say I'm not present, that's cause I'm in a million dimensions at the same time.

We need a bounty hunter sub-group for the iGTA crew that hunts and kills people who bought their fortune.

I parachuted onto the top of the cable car with Michael, and as I was celebrating my success with a selfie, I fell off the side and plummeted to my death. As if that wasn't funny enough, in dying, michael's head got pushed up past his groin. He died looking like a human hamburger trying to suck itself off.

Everyone who buys their shit with real money should have an icon above their character in-game, so that everyone can taunt them mercilessly. Or boot them from their game if there's an option to do it.

Shhhh. I'm just in it for the murder.

"THE ROADTRIP" Starring Franklin Clinton, and the Regina. Fresh outa the shop Rockin the best plate ever Sleepy time The dawn approaches Dammit headlight's out. Time to refuel OH DEER! Oops Dat los santos Oops again That's your problem right there! Moooooooooooooooooo! Back In L.S. Old Regina Didn't float

Hurr's ma pics. Quick pano from Pacific Bluffs last night. Wanna get higher tonight and make a larger one. We only ask you speak inglish. What cha doin', Frankie? I've seen things. Follow me for the Truth. Midnight Blue and pearlescent Pfister Pink. To match the suit. My Buffalo a couple of days ago, before it was reset to standard. I'll upload it's current state when I get home. FUCK YOU!! Find one of these, take it off-roading. Thank me later. GOT ME A SCORE OF FORTY! Oh shit, how's it Mike?!

Only if you're incompetent. Some kid can buy millions of dollars to get a rocket launcher and a Cheetah and whatever else, but I can still headshot him with a lowly pistol if I think he's going to try to interfere with my honest earning. People can do what they please, I don't care. It's not going to ruin my fun. If anything, this is a good sign for honest players, because people dumb enough to buy in-game money are likely dumb enough to not immediately go to an ATM, and I will happily murder and rob them. It's a shame Rockstar sunk to this level, but I support anything that takes money from people who are too stupid to have it.

From the Newswire: Some More Details on Grand Theft Auto Online Dear All, We are humbled and overwhelmed by the response to Grand Theft Auto V – literally overwhelmed in the case of some of our servers! We sincerely hope you're enjoying your visit to Los Santos and we know many of you have plenty of questions about Grand Theft Auto Online. First, we thought it would be useful to provide some details of the roll out of GTA Online, and how we hope you will be involved in making the game everything it can be. Grand Theft Auto Online is going to be something brand new for us: a fully realized and living world for multiple players that will continue to grow and take shape over time. The ultimate shape of GTA Online will be determined as much by you, the player, as by the work we put in. What you like and don’t like, what you play and what you want will determine how the game develops and what it turns into. Everything we do will be informed by feedback from you all – from the types of missions that roll out to all kinds of future content. We are planning for a constant stream of new content, tweaks and updates in the weeks and months ahead. The first couple of weeks we expect to be heavily focused on tuning the experience as it goes from internal testing to the reality of being played by tons of people in the real world so that all the usual teething problems for an online game are overcome. We hope it will all run incredibly smoothly, but please bear with us if it doesn't, and help us fix any and all problems! After that, we will begin releasing content updates and giving you the opportunity to make your own content. GTA Community Feedback Needed from Day One This is vital for the ongoing success of the game. The first few months of Grand Theft Auto Online will be critical as everyone enters this dynamic new world for the first time. Plenty of issues are bound to occur. ?One thing we are already aware of, and are trying to alleviate as fast as we can, is the unanticipated additional pressure on the servers due to a significantly higher number of players than we were anticipating at this point – we are working around the clock to buy and add more servers, but this increased scale is only going to make the first few days even more temperamental than such things usually are. This is part of the problem some of you have been experiencing with the iFruit App and some Social Club services – we apologize in advance for this and thank you for your patience in this area. More than ever, we need your help to report your experiences, findings, likes, loves, dislikes and hates – and we will be looking at your feedback constantly to tune the game into its optimal shape and help guide how Grand Theft Auto Online will grow and evolve past this initial period. We will be checking out how people are playing and what they are not playing or not enjoying, while also monitoring feedback via two other new Rockstar channels: [email protected]: This email address will be active from launch day as a place to send your input and feedback direct to us relating to the game. GTA Online Forums at Social Club: At some point this fall after the initial release of GTA Online, we are planning to launch Social Club Forums where players can chat with one another about their online experiences as well as access a GTA Online Suggestion board to post about any suggested features, tweaks and changes you want to see. Here’s a rough overview of what you can expect on day one as well as initial details about how the GTA Online world will evolve from there. The Launch of Grand Theft Auto Online: From launch, up to 16 players can enter the world together to partake in everything from: Open-World Crime and Chaos: Go on your own or round up your friends to explore the open world together – catch a movie, go mountain biking, hit the shooting range and much more. Want to test the law? Knock over a convenience store, take down a gang or rob an armored truck for easy cash and reputation. Jobs: Los Santos and Blaine County are ripe with opportunity for the ambitious and criminal minded. Take on Missions and an array of other Jobs as a lone wolf, team up with your Crew or join fellow mercenaries and degenerates to pull off a wide range of robberies and illicit activities together. Races: Everything from classic street competition and off-road tracks to boat racing on the open ocean, or take to the skies in aerial events. Jump into the madness of a GTA Race, or try out a brand new race type, Rally, where driver and co-pilot work together to navigate treacherous courses at high speeds. Sports: Join your friends / any random stranger for a game of tennis, a round of golf or go base jumping and more, all for cash and Reputation. Customization: Create your character using the Character Creator – then earn some cash and spend it getting dressed for success. You can also collect and customize cars for your garage and personalize your full weapons cache. Reputation and Cash Flow: Reputation is earned from all your online exploits in everything you do in GTA Online – and will help you rank up, providing access to new features, weapons and criminal contacts. Spend cash you’ve gained on cars, clothes, guns, properties and much more. You can either quickly accumulate cash through profitable activities like knocking over armored cars, winning street races, doing stick-ups or a host of other cash-making endeavors – or if you’re the completely instant gratification type, you can choose to buy denominations of GTA$. You will have the option to purchase GTA$ through the in-game Store. The game and its economy have been designed and balanced for the vast majority of players who will not buy extra cash. There is no in-game paywall and nothing that should disrupt the balance of the game. You don’t have to spend real money to attain the cars, guns, clothes, flash and style of a high-roller in Los Santos, but can if you wish to get them a little quicker. The economy is balanced differently from the single player economy, and cash earned in one cannot be taken over to the other. Most players will earn cash much faster Online than in Story Mode. Growing Pains: There will be the typical growing pains for an online game, including but not limited to crashes, glitches, crazy bugs, gameplay modes and mechanics that need re-balancing and other surprises! Even in GTAV Story Mode, some of you may have seen a few odd and even amusing little glitches out there last week. This sort of thing is inevitable in a massive open-world game and there’ll surely be lots more unexpected oddities like this in the Online world next week – rest assured we’ll be monitoring and actively doing all we can to smooth such things out as they happen, but we need your help to find them, as well as your feedback to help fine tune all of the game's systems so everything is perfectly balanced. Currently Planned GTA Online Content Updates: Here is a quick overview of a few initial things we’re working on for the first few weeks of Grand Theft Auto Online, alongside an aggressive period of tuning and finessing the game. We will give you dates for all of this content as soon as we have them – bear in mind that the order of things may well change, and we will probably add some extra stuff as well! The Content Creator: The Content Creator will launch with tools to tailor and publish your own Deathmatches & Races. The Beach Bum Pack: Featuring 4 new amazing beach fun vehicles, over 300 new items of incredible down tempo leisure wear and 2 new but not remotely relaxing weapons. Capture the Flag: GTA Online’s take on the classic CTF mode including the ability to make your own using The Content Creator. Heists: This update will introduce full-on cooperative Heist missions that will require careful planning, teamwork and sharp execution – along with the Heist Planning Board for your apartment. Just to be clear, all of these updates will be free. We’ll have more info on this and much more additional content as our plans develop through the launch period, and as we get feedback from you. Please stay tuned for further info and updates. And remember – we need your help to make this experience all it can be. Thank you everyone, Rockstar Games

Holy shit. Black Sox posted a thread I don't want to troll. Seriously though, nice posts, this thread helped me out a bit.

Well if R* say it doesn't imbalance the game, then i hear that. Mass, i'm totally in. If i see any fucker with top end shit in the first couple of days, i'll be gunning for them hard. Blowin' up their vehicles, shittin' on their moms, hide yo' cash, hide yo' life, steal yo' stash, rape yo' wife!

That's my mind in the background, it's blown!

This is cool, where is it located?

@Handsome B Wonderful. I recommend investing in the company with the lowest Stock Price, when it's at it's lowest ( it should be the only company under $4.00 ). You should buy it when it goes down to $3.50, and then sell it when it goes up to $6-7 Dollars. This could take a while so I recommend maxing out the Stats for the characters, and getting tats/ haircuts/ clothes, customizing cars, or exploring the map in the mean time. Or if you want to do it the fast way ( which I recommend ), go and use the save feature at one of the character houses to fast forward the game 8 hours over and over ( which will speed up the days and weeks into a matter of minutes ). This will speed up the fluctuations of your companies Stock Price. Check your portfolio every so often to see whether the Share Price has risen high enough, and then sell the stock. Then use the Sleep Function again to speed up the process of the Stock Price decreasing back to $3.50, and then buy it again. After that do the whole process again ( waiting, then selling once the stock price has risen to $6-7 Dollars again ). This can be a little bit tedious and time consuming, so I recommend only using this method after you have a couple of Million Dollars to invest, it will make the whole money making scheme go much faster. So if you started by investing $2,000,000 at $3.50 a Share, then sell it for $7.00 a share, you will have $4,000,000. Invest it again, buying and selling for the same price you will now have $8,000,000, after that $16 Million....... then $32 Million, then $64 Million, then $128 Million, then $256 Million, then $512 Million, then $1,024,000,000 ( 1 Billion 24 Million Dollars ). So after reinvesting the money 9 times ( which would probably take some time ), you would eventually end up with over a Billion Dollars. Which is more than you would ever need. All it takes is some time and patience, and you can eventually make a lot of money on the Stock Market...

I still haven't found a decent explanation on how non-mission related single player stocks are affected. Or Bawsaq, for that matter. For example, there are people blowing up pisswasser trucks to raise the price of Logger, but Logger is only listed on LCN, which isn't supposed to be affected by the online community. Yet the price of Logger is always high. And Bawsaq is required for investing in Fruit after a tip from Lester. I give up.

Blimp surfing. Wheeeee!!!

Whats the single best feature most of us dont know about? Whats the single best feature most of us dont know about?

If he was an avid percussionist and wished to get better he should take any helpful criticism. He appeared to have a sloppy technique, but I don't know his experience and the camera didn't fully focus, he also appears to be incorrectly holding his sticks but that again comes from if he was self taught and his experience. If a person can't take criticism then they shouldn't post about themselves on the internet. Saying "you appear to have poor technique" is certainly criticism but not helpful. Helpful is actually suggesting elements of good technique.

They are also timed. If you don't go there within a time limit the mission disappears

It will be labeled a P on the HUD. I quit doing the side missions for properties it got to be worse than having to go bowling with Roman. I get at least 2-3 emails a day with Micheal, the occasional one with Franklin, and about 4 a week with Trevor. You will receive a payment between 00:00 and 01:00 every Monday. You will only be paid $500 per car there is no base pay.

Apart from when you in the middle of a field (roads surrounding it).. in that situation theres nothing available

Cinema Doppler income is 132,200 which makes it as good a purchase as Ten Cent. Both together cost the same as Tivoli but pay more than 2.5 times as much. I have a feeling that weekly income does depend on the missions you do for certain properties. For instance, with Trevor I got 0 income from mckenzie field and linked it to not having done any missions there because prior to this and thereafter I did missions there and received a weekly income in the vincinity of $23k.

Get that Flight skill up, turbulence is pretty much a non-issue afterwards. Also, keep the cockpit glass intact. Wind affects you more if there are any shattered panes.

call it in on your phone... there should be a blimp contact... EDIT: ^what he said ...

replicated the mask sunglasses glitch true love walked up to trevor drinking and playing with nades ....cant really see the grenade. they were blowing up nicely.

With all the different options for parachutes they should of added a wing suit. DLC!!!

Fuck it i'll do this.

Show me your bright lights and your city lights, all right. My own personal Jesus: A cop on patrol, they do exist! Camera? What camera? I'm just checking text messages, sheesh...

i was driving thru the wind farm when i was coming up on an RV that was rocking... once i could peer inside, someone yells, "he can see us!"... then two guys get out of the RV and start shooting at me, and one is missing his pants ...

Do all of the bank heists to make some starting capital, then invest all your money in the appropriate companies for the Lester assassination missions.

'What DO you want Micheal?'

Alternatively it's a fast-track method for people that don't have the time to grind money. I don't have an issue with that, as long as it doesn't give an unfair advantage. It depends what sort of scale we're talking about with cash and what you're able to do it. It's one solution to the issue with previous games where people who are able to spend hours and hours ranking up get a massive advantage over casual players/people just starting out. Let's wait and see first... Un-Rockstar-y or not, micro-transactions are worth a lot of money. Everyone is doing it.

I often think I can jump over shit that I can't, the amount of times I've had Trevor face plant into a fence is ridiculous but each time I laugh, never gets old.

Likewise, maybe because there was 3 characters they had to shorten the story but man 69 missions is not enough in my opinion considering they had 4/5 years with this thing. I mean San Andreas had 105 missions and IV had 91 missions. To me the main story line is too short - they could have easily extended some aspects with each of the 3 characters. They kind of tried to have more side missions to detract from the short story-line but it is a little disappointing. Edit Also

I thought it could've been a bit longer, but maybe that's just because I enjoyed the missions.

I was playing with Chop and went to throw him the ball but because I forgot to press the right button to take him for a walk I rushed into the wheel to throw him the ball and threw him a grenade instead.

Chose the same for the exact same reasons, turns out Glad to be finished and I liked the ending, but regards to Trevor

i found another IV character! ... you run into them while doing the epsilon missions... i finally got those missions working, the email mysteriously showed up in my inbox again... but anyways,

Finished the game last night, ending was ok, didn't feel as depressed as when I finished IV lol.

I hope I haven't fucked up my chance to recruit him - I can't remember meeting him yet but he won't turn up where Massacre mentioned. Is he in the carpark itself?

Ah, this was the topic.

1) There's an "SMG" pick up under Del Perro Pier ( easy free ammo ). 2) An easy way to win every Tennis game where your opponent is serving ( on Hard Difficulty ). Is to stand very close to the backside box ( the square where the ball is served into ), and then take the ball as early as you can, and use a slice shot to hit the ball into the opposite corner of the court to where your opponent is. Then use a top spin shot to quickly put the ball into the opposite corner of the court ( your opponent will never beat both of these shots/ if done correctly ). I call this the Andre Agassi Strategy... And once you've mastered the serve, you'll never be beaten again. Aim away from where your opponent is standing and try and get the serve marker to the top for the most power ( obviously ).

Alright soliciting time, Ladies and Gentlemen i bring you the greatest damn thing you will ever see this is "POWER HOUSE" http://socialclub.ro...ew/power_house_ All Muscle Cars all the time

Good East Coast Rappers & Hip Hop Groups ~ - Nas ( the best ) - Biggie Smalls - Big L - Wu Tang Clan's ~ RZA, GZA, Method Man, Raekwon, Ghostface Killah, Inspectah Deck, U-god, Masta Killa & Ol' Dirty Bastard - Jay Z - Mobb Deep - AZ - Immortal Technique - Jedi Mind Tricks - Kool G Rap - 50 Cent - DMX - Rakim - LL Cool J - Big Daddy Kane - Big Pun - Busta Rhymes - Jeru the Damaja - Gang Starr - Army of the Pharaohs - Dead Prez - Papoose - Non Phixion - Mos Def - Fabolous - Jadakiss - Etc. God I hate Aussie Hip Hop...