ViceMan

I just had a thought... You're involved in a 4 star police chase, speeding through the twisting country roads with the fuzz hot on your tail, then out of nowhere a deer jumps out into the road and you plow straight through it at 60mph totalling your car and sending you flying off into some trees. Now that would be pretty epic. More so if Tommy was driving the car and CJ was masturbating in the passenger's seat.

Suppose i'd better post my yearly beard photo. Luckily it's slightly blurry so you don't have to witness the full terror. Oh Ezio's in there too.

I like drawing tribal style patterns just for the fuck of it if I have a pen to hand. But i'd never consider getting a tattoo, really doesn't appeal to me, unless I was some 6ft 2 muscley ego prick... which i'm not. Is that your tattoo or just a random pic?

That's the worst chat up line i've ever heard.

*engages fanboy mode* Fuck no, just... no.

To: QDs from Rockstar. Subject: Tommy?!!11! CJ?!!1! "hai can u plox tell me wen GTA v is goin 2 b rallaesd n also f tommy n CJ wll b init dat wud b so kl ps u r QDs hahaha.........."

You can see Tommy masturbating in a window at 0:50.

A pretty good attempt, I see they based the city layout heavily on the old LS. The only problem is I can't see the old Grove Street cul-de-sac. Where would CJ's house be?

I think this proves 100% that Tommy and CJ's illegitimate lovechild is the protagonist.

It's not even leaks, it's just people posting their fantasies or ideas as concrete facts, and gullible cunts believing it and reposting it to every forum they can think of. It's getting on my tits so much i'm not checking the GTA V section of the forum until I see something on the main page saying "official R* update." Fuck y'all.

For fuck's sake will you stop putting those boxes in, nobody gives a shit about you, Illuminati isn't coming to steal your face, alright?

Those kind monkeys, they're filling the case with clothing.

I was really quiet in school, didn't start getting more confidence until year 10-11. I got taken the piss out of a bit by the "it" kids because I was so quiet but nothing much, of course it hasn't left me mentally scarred for life. I started mouthing back a bit in year 10 and getting involved in the japery, but even then i'd still class myself as an outsider. Never was one of the popular kids, and i'm fucking glad. I remember me and my mates used to take the piss out of the teachers, each one had a catchprase that we used to look out for during lessons, sort of made us laugh 'cause we had a weird sense of humour. We had a teacher called Mr. Harris for French in about year 10, and I sat at the front of the class in front of his desk. He was a Brummie and had a really nasal voice so hearing him speak French was fucking hilarious. The "it" kids used to steal his bromcom (if you don't know what that is it's an electronic register that all goes into the school's server so they can see who's not in lesson etc.) before he came into the class at the beginning of the lesson, they also nicked his hat one time. When he got up I used to kick the drawer in his desk open so he tripped over it, I can't remember if he ever found out it was me but it shouldn't have been hard to work out. Suffice to say we didn't get much done in French lessons and I ended up getting an F... for French. I never did any "cool" rebellious stuff because deep down I was quite sensible and studious, I still am.

I always pre order, you get it a day early and you haven't got to go out and look at all the strangers ugly faces in the street. Also fuck midnight releases, I would never queue up at midnight like a pleb to get any game, how degrading.

And cup their ball sack and/or stimulate their clitoris. I see everyone else has gone for the serious route, meh.

He doesn't sound freaky in this, and Altair's voice has changed too.

Just don't mention anything about CJ or Tommy in GTA V and we'll get along fine.

Constantinople is a nice aesthetical change from Italy. Oh and Subject 16 makes an appearance in about the first minute of the game. Also fuck spoilers, you read it, your fault.

As I said he looks like an aged Al Pacino in this one. Anyway there are a few things to note about the game: The Assassin dens return from Brotherhood but have been expanded with some other options and can also come under attack from Templars when your notoriety is at max. It gets a bit tedious running all the way across the map to defend the den though. Defending involves a bit of an RTS minigame where you place various Assassin types (who are armed with weapons including crossbows, rifles, bombs, melee etc.) along the rooftops to attack the oncoming Templars, you can also place barricades that contain weapons such as flamethrowers and proto-machine guns. You need barricades because the Templars always finish their attack with a mobile siege unit of some sort. Oh you can use your gun and call for bombs to blow up enemies too. Janissaries are pretty tough to beat, they're a bit like the Papal guards from Brotherhood. They have a ranged weapon and are also deadly in melee. I've only taken on one group of four so far but it took a while to take them all out. Some of the new hookblade executions are brutal and make me say "oh shit" a lot. Especially the one where Ezio ducks behind the enemy with the hookblade under his chin and yanks him down to the ground ripping his jaw off. Combat itself seems a lot easier though and combo kills are common, you just wait for the first enemy to attack, counter attack and kill the other enemies in quick succession. Hookblade itself isn't really noticeable in freerunning, you can zip down wires which is their main use. All the stuff about upgrading shops from Brotherhood returns. As do banks, making getting money rather too easy. You can be jumped from behind by some freelance assassin, the first time this happened I didn't know what was going on as he grabbed me from behind and I had to quickly counter grab to throw him to the floor. After that it's pretty easy to spot as tense music will play, giving you about 5 seconds to turn around and kill your would-be assassin with a preemptive strike. Now i'm bored of typing so i'm going back to AC...

We could go back to the days of Egypt around 2000 B.C. I suppose, that's three thousand years before Altair.

GTA IV took so long because it was the first GTA game on the RAGE engine and they were working from scratch, now they've had a lot of experience with IV, RDR, etc.

That's ok TreeFitty is a fireman and he's from around that area. He can cum in our eyes to put the fire out.

I don't think the guy speaking in the trailer has kids, he's just voicing his desire to have them. I'unno, just my take.

I think it's at 80% at least, the map looked quite fleshed out to me, and we saw what look like missions. They wouldn't start work on the missions until they had a pretty good idea of the map layout.